Posted by Frank Chin on May 16, 2005 at 07:53:51:
Gerry:
I don’t know how busy you are, and your dad’s mental condition, but if it were my dad, I take a few days off just to go over to take a look. I’m in NYC, and we have relatives in MD, and it takes a few hours drive to get there, and for us its a weekend trip. As you’re in VA, its not like you’re on the other side of the country.
My dad went to a nursing home 2 years ago, and gave my younger brother POA to take care of a number of things he can’t handle himself, such as doing an eviction. I was able to visit my dad, the home had me sign some papers, and with that I had no trouble calling the place to have things done. I even got the name, and direct number of the nurse’s station, the name of the head nurse there on the floor where my dad was at, and asked if it was OK to call her directly.
In talking to the staff, I find they have great appreciation for those showing up and spending time with the patients because I’m told in the majority of cases, the patients feel abandoned because the kids don’t show up, or in a few cases, show up and get into arguments with the staff and their parents.
In my case, my dad didn’t care for the food at the facilty, and once or twice a week I drop by with stuff that he liked. In time, the staff realized that on those days, the dinner they served is usually taken back and thrown away. Finally, they had me pick the dinner from the menu, and I ate my dad’s dinner. Because I love soup, and they always make a few extra, I get to eat a few bowls of it, especially if its split pea.
So, the point here is you may find the staff very helpful if they get to know you.
So before spending big money on attorney’s show up as a concerned son (or daughter), and find out from the staff what their procedures are, as it can vary somewhat state by state.
Frank Chin